Itch!!

Sze is not a happy person today... :(

Woke up last evening from my afternoon nap (having to wake up every two hourly in the night to cater to Isaac's night feed means that i can only catch up on my sleep in between his feeds in the day), and found myself covered with large pink spots/rashes all over which were unbearably itchy (and very ugly too) !!

Went to my family doc this morning and doc diagnosed it as a bout of allergic reaction to something which i've either eaten or touched. I recalled yesterday's event and remembered that my mum gave me this little cup of D.O.M (hard liquor that is apparantly good for ladies in confinement to build up their strength) to consume, to which i dutifully obliged. My suspicions is that it must be the hard liquor to which i was allergic to!! :(

Anyhow, have been given some medication to consume and apply to the rashes. Praying that it will really stop the itch and make the rashes disappear quickly! Thankfully, the rashes are not contagious and I can continue to nurse little Isaac. What will the little one do without his "human vending machine"??

;)

Thoughts from the new mum

A friend had asked me in an sms whether i was a super cool mum or the kan chiong type. Well, I thought i was a super cool cucumber mum until last evening when Isaac seemed to be crying non-stop for quite a while (doesn't help as he has quite big lungs!!). Then I got a little kan chiong and nearly cried myself in perplexity. But things soon calmed down, thanks to help from my mum...apparantly his diaper was full of shit making him very uncomfortable! Well, i think his reaction is typical of anyone who finds himself in deep shit (!) ;)

At first I was a little stressed, not so much over Isaac, but more of Yuan Liang because he was trying to be this "super-on" papa. He was reading up about everything and then worrying about this and that...rushing through his dinner so that he can quickly go into the room and watch over Isaac...and waking up with me everytime Isaac needs his night feed!! As a result, he became super tired, and made me worry about whether he would be alert enough to drive to work each morning! But now he has become a bit cooler, so thats good and i have one less person to worry about! But really, I wanna' thank God for him for being such an involved father and loving husband!! :)

Anyhow, its been a time of adaptation, after the elation and relief of Isaac finally joining us. The late night feedings were a bit siong at first, but i guess we kind of got used to it now...

And then there is this whole breastfeeding thingamy that i am trying to understand. The good news is that i seem to be overflowing with milk and can satisfy his hunger (he's got a huge appetite!). The bad news is the "overflowing" bit (well, i don't think i need to explain further...). Somehow, I need to learn how to try and send the right signals to my brain to request for a lower level of milk production!! Any mother out there with any tips to share? =)

Oh oh....i hear him making his little noise again....time for yet another feed!! ciao for now...

1 week old!!

Thoughts as a new father

Here are some random thots from YL.... :
(He has been missing lots of sleep and has difficulties organising his thoughts logically...)

1) As I was with Sze in the delivery room, a great sense of affection towards her seemed to overwhelm me as I witness what she had to go through.

2) The emergence of Isaac's head is a most miraculous event and hearing his first cry is sublimal. It took a while for me to realise the fact that this boy is my son(!) whom Sze has been carrying for the past 9 months...then it is this unconditional compassion and affection that you suddenly have for your son that comes flowing!

3) Enduring through the sleepless nights assisting with feeding, burping and changing diapers has been most trying for me...To me, it seems harder then doing a PhD. In London, I thought that the sleepless nights I had struggling with quantum theory had been bad but this seems even more trying...Here, you have a human life placed in your hands! But as for Sze, she seemed to possess this superhuman ability despite her relative physical weakness...maybe its the maternal instinct that God has gifted to all mothers!

4) Holding Isaac in my hands and telling him that I love him suddenly made me realise that maybe thats how God feels about us. God wants us to know but our limited human ability and stubborness makes it hard...and we will have to grow and learn through experience in order to appreciate His love more fully... Its the same for Isaac. For right now, he doesn't know that the people who love him are his parents.. but he will surely learn and understand as he grows up...

5) Suddenly, you appreciate your parents a lot more!

6) Anyway, I like his chinese name, 家乐 (pronounced as "Jia Le", which means "Joy of the Family".)

7) What always sticks to my mind is the scent of the newborn baby's head....(which is a lyric from a U2 song... "Freedom has a scent like the top of a newborn baby's head")... the first thing I did instinctively was to smell his head.

Recalling the Birth

It was Monday morning (21 Nov 2005). We were indecisive about whether I should still go to work. But having decided the night before that we will go for a checkup at the hospital and see what the doctor says, we made our way to the delivery suite in KK hospital early in the morning at 8am.

The nurses strapped me to the CTG machine again to monitor my contractions and the fetal heartbeat. There was still NO PAIN at the moment. After half an hour, one of the on-duty doc came and told me that my contractions were every 5 min apart and I was 3.5cm dilated. The doc told me that they will break my water bag to hasten the labour, and the baby would be out in 7-10 hours!

I was at first hesitant about the breaking of waterbag as we had heard that the contractions would be rather "unbearable" thereafter, and many of our friends who had opted not to have an epidural had succumbed to the pain-relief after having their waterbag artificially burst. But, since we didn't want to play the "waiting game" any longer, we thought we will just go ahead with the doc's suggestion and pray for courage. :)

9am: This houseman came by to administer the drip. He wasn't very good at it and only got the procedure right after the 3rd attempt, having burst two of my blood vessals on the veins of my hands in the first 2! YL was eyeing him angrily and wanted to "box the doc" for hurting his wife! I was ok, given my high threshold of pain...

9.30am : My gyne Dr Ben Tham came to the delivery room and broke the waterbag.

10am: The contractions came stronger and were approx 1-2 min apart, and i finally felt "pain" but they were still bearable...

10:30am: I now felt REAL PAIN and was coping via "will power" and lots of prayer.

11am: I was (only) about 4cm-ish dilated. The nurse (Sister Seet) gave me the "laughing gas". We forgot to ask for it earlier!! At this time, I could still administer the "laughing gas" by myself, but I was certainly NOT laughing!

12pm: Two nurses took turns to come in to encourage me...YL was cheering me throughout. With one eye on me and the other on the CTG monitor, he was telling me when to expect the big contractions and when they were "fading off". By this time, he was also administering the laughing gas to me, by bringing the mask over as and when he sees the contractions coming. I was in too much pain and too "weak" to do it by myself.

1pm: "Breathe hard and fast" YL would instruct, whenever he saw the "pain index" on the CTG monitor peaked. I was in a state of delirium and couldn't think straight....all i could do was to obey the instructions, putting all my trust in my man.

2pm: "Dear, you are really doing very well...I love you" YL whispered..... And I could only moan in response.

3pm: The nurse came in and got me to start "pushing"...Dr Tham soon joined her too and gently but firmly instructed me on "how to push and breathe". In between repeating the breathing instructions, YL was giving me a running commentary on the progress that he was witnessing.

3:30pm: I was soooo tired, that deep inside, i wanted to ask for the epidural. I didn't, for i don't want to give in and also know that it is way too late. I gave the additional push where I felt I could. And when I felt I couldn't push, I just ignored the instructions from my cheering team.

3:45pm: Nurse Seet told me, "We're not lying to you!...you've come very far, even though you may not feel it". YL added excitedly "I can see the head crowning!! So much hair!" Deep inside, I was going, "hah? crowning? So? Is it going to be over soon??"

4:09pm: Nurse Seet, Dr Tham and YL in unison, "He's out!!" and I hear the cry of our child for the first time! I couldn't respond in words, and just collapsed back on the labour bed, totally drained... YL gave me a big kiss, went over to stare at our son and then came back and whispered to me, "He's a handsome chap". He then took out the camera and started to snap numerous photos of our son, Isaac Lim.



The Lims welcome our new addition after 7 hours of hard labour.

Announcing the birth of Isaac Lim!!

Yep, he's finally joined us!!

Some brief details of the birth first:

Hospital : KK Hospital
Date Arrived : 21 Nov 2005
Time Arrived : 4.09pm
Time taken for delivery : Approx 7 hours
Mode of Arrival : Natural Birth & WITHOUT Epidurum (Brave mama!!)
Weight at birth : 3.32kg
Length at birth : 49cm
Looks : Handsome (but we're his parents, so we're naturally biased!)


More details soon... :)

Still labouring. :)

Last night, we had planned to go to church this morning if we are not already in the hospital.

However, I think the excitement of the day before (being told by Gyne that we are in labour) got the better of us and we woke up real late. I also felt some menses-like cramps and so thought that perhaps we had better packed our hospital bag and be on standby.

Thereafter, we went about very much like before. Had lunch, went out to my parents' place and went to YL's parents' place for dinner.

For the whole day, the contractions were still PAINLESS and I thought pretty much mild, so much so that I got used to them and very much ignored them! That in itself could present a problem, as I have no idea if they were getting closer in between. It really takes lots of discipline under these circumstances, to monitor the contractions.

Then we were wondering if there is any decrease in fetal movements. Thats also quite difficult as after a while, I got rather confused between fetal movements and contractions. But the little one did give me a few big kicks now and then to tell me that he is ok.

At 9pm, we were contemplating on going to KKH's labour ward for checkups to see if they can tell us if I am further dilated (beyond the 2cm that we were told yesterday). After a long discussion, we decided to put things on hold, as we are really not in any distress.

We prayed together, thanking God for His grace so far (the painless contractions) and asked that He would give us very obvious signals to indicate when we should proceed to the hospital.

YL is imagining that there would be something dramatic happening at night, either the water bag breaking or I would get much more intense (but still painless!) contractions, and then we could rush ourselves to the hospital....well, we'll see.... :)